Victoria Sports Online

by Jammer Karim

Rah Rah-ah-ah-ah, Roma Roma-ma, Jammer ooh la la, I want your romance. Okay so… 21 thoughts this week in honor of the amount of people who now think I am an absolute flamer.

1. Let’s get ‘er rollin with the funniest video I’ve seen in a long time. Who needs a “Bad Romance” when you got a “Habs Romance”? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsQdD0adrW8&feature=email

2. The CFL Draft took place this morning. The five guys out in Halifax who actually watched it made it the most watched CFL broadcast in nearly 10 years.

3. Dallas Cowboys first round draft pick (or as I like to call it, first round steal) Dez Bryant, has recently drawn a lot of media attention. Apparently, during one of his pre-draft team interviews, Miami Dolphins’ general manager asked Bryant if his mom was a prostitute.

4. Bryant denied the claim, so the Dolphins contacted Tiger Woods to get confirmation.

5. While you can definitely get your money’s worth out of a first round draft pick, no one offers more bang for your buck than...well, you know.

6. Stat of the week: Phoenix Suns forward Grant Hill advanced to the second round of the NBA Playoffs for the first time in his NBA career. Yes, you read that right. Grant Hill, the man who was the best basketball player in the world not named Michael Jordan during the mid 90’s. The man who made a guest star appearance on the most underrated TV series of all time, Home Improvement. And the man who may or may not be related to R&B singer Lauren Hill, made the second round of the playoffs for the FIRST TIME.

7. And here we thought Grant was “over the Hill”....

8. The World Cup of Soccer trophy touched down in Canada earlier this week. In a statement given to the Vancouver Sun, the trophy said it has never felt so out of place before.

9. Check out this golf course. This actually exists. Only one player (Padraig Harrington) has ever parred this hole. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_pUUDf_55KQ

10. It is rumored that TMZ is planning to launch a new website called “TMZ Sports” towards the end of 2010. Will this be Tiger Woods’ greatest contribution to society?

11. Picture of the week: Ever wonder how much love Mark Messier got in the 80’s, playing in the shadows of that Gretzky guy? http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/4HJYq8/sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2010/imag...

12. Quote of the week: "The 5-on-3, it's a penalty, but don't dive and embellish it. If you're from Western Canada, don't do that...Don’t do that crap" Detroit Red Wings Coach Mike Babcock, referring to Sharks forward Devin Setoguchi

13. I’m willing to bet a c-note that Setoguchi doesn’t get one more call the rest of this series.

14. NOTE: If you watched game two, you would know that I already lost the money.

15. Sticking with the NHL playoffs, when did Hal Gill become a playoff dynamo? The guy was booed out of Toronto, and then suddenly wins a Stanley Cup. Now this year he plays a pivotal role in shutting down the most explosive player on the planet, Alexander Ovechkin. This is what's wrong with the NHL.

16. Check out this video from the Croatian basketball league finals. This has to be the most demoralizing and embarrassing loss in the history of sports. Quick rundown: The white team (home team) scores a three-pointer with 0.6 seconds left in the game to take the lead. Not realizing there was still time on the clock, they start to celebrate as if they won the championship. The black team takes the ball and shoots it from an unheard of distance, and wins the game. I’ll let the Croatian commentator fill in the rest: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s10eG415NxU&feature=related

17. The Los Angeles Lakers advanced to the second round of the NBA Playoffs with a last second, win over the Oklahoma City Thunder. What makes this team scary isn’t the fact that Kobe Bryant turns into a robot during the last minute of every game. Or that he becomes cyber-optically immune to missing jump shots, but rather it’s the fact that Ron Artest can get away with this, and still be the most feared one on one defender on the planet: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGL3qigrgqk

18. I guess we can just chalk this up as “Whoa, Artest is at it again” (1:00 mark)

19. Hot half naked women, throwing money at the camera, mentioning your own name multiple times in your rap lines—way to buy into the stereotype there Artest.

20. Final thought: The Canucks went WWE vintage on Saturday night, and laid the “smackdown” on the Chicago Blackhawks. The most interesting part for me was that I had to double check the box score three times to make sure that Marian Hossa was indeed actually playing last night. Big Hoss has been a no-show again these playoffs. You know what Red Wings fans are saying right now?

21. “Whoa, Marian Hossa is at it again”

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